post-Christmas pre-New Year

I now have one of those nike things which tells you how far you've run and that sort of thing,

Haven't tried it out yet of course, but I may well do so tomorrow... After all this is the ideal time to work off all the over-eating, over-drinking, over indulgence of the past few days.

Haven't been to the gym since last Tuesday (it's now Sunday) so I may also have to go there tomorrow as well. hmm sounds like a lot of exercise - but I do have an awful lot to catch up on...

Really truly cold

Barely above freezing - gloves, shorts (huh?), fleece, etc etc
And less than 5 miles, and with a hangover.

Still, it was some kind of run, can't deny that.

I admit I'm not as fit as I was, it was hard work, but I think the calf thing is dealt with. I do get pains down the outside of my left thigh and hip now. Possibly something to do with IT band again I don't know. But I do know I need some long trousers if I'm going to keep it up.

Obviously I go so regularly now - almost twice a month - I am in danger of getting obsessed...

I have finished the 3 month gym thing and it was worth it. I've signed up for regular gymmy stuff - but I already have missed a session - as in not going 3 times a week like i thought i would. But it was snowing today and I couldn't get the car out and I was busy and a dog ate my homework...

Off and Running

Oh my god - did 5 miles or so this morning and nearly killed myself.

It was ok to begin with but then my hips and thighs and whatnot just kind of seized up and became fairly painful. I did finish though (not sure if it's a good thing to run through such agony, but we'll see tomorrow...)

So is this the start of running recovery or just another step down the road to decrepitude?
It's my birthday tomorrow so at least I have the satisfaction of knowing I've crossed into middle 40s with a gym membership I use and having just run 5 miles.

It's still raining

Haven't been running due to rain

I'm going for a run this morning and it feels like a big deal. I have a new top - get me - and it's cold and windy. I haven't run for about 3 weeks and last time my calves ruined it.

But this time, I've been working out, getting stronger (really???) and am hoping I can at least do about 3 miles without getting hurt.

Not looking forward to going out in the nasty weather though.


Later...
I did 3 1/2 miles or so and so trouble at all from my calves - result!! I also felt stronger, as in lighter in a weird way and marginally less wobbly (all good) but there was a new pain down my left leg which I'm putting down to starting to run without being all twisted round - might take a bit of getting used to - but I'm assuming it's a positive thing...

Also I felt a lot less fit than before - but then I haven't had a proper run since mid-September. Another thing to work on...

But generally, positive. Very happy. Don't want to turn into some dreadful, chair-bound slob of a middle-ager. Not that I'm much more than a couple of runs away from being exactly that.

Oh, and the new top was a triumph.
:)

Another gym session.

It's with the new machines and they're not too bad to be honest. The inner thigh one will takes some getting used to (although you get a stretch as well as a workout at the same time!!) and the calf thing was ok and the rotary core thing wasn't as bad as I'd feared - I probably wasn't using it right.

It's like starting over again though - and I want results I can feel quite soon and my worry is I'm getting off course by bringing in new stuff... but I know I have to view this whole gym thing as a long-term project, not one that ends after my 12-week programme finishes. (I have yet to decide what to do at that point - do I sign up for another 12 weeks, or become a regular member and pay for extra 1 to 1s? I just don't know - I would think they'd chat through the options when the time comes)

But generally things are OK. I'm eyeing up new kit for when I'm back out running - but it's so hard to buy online when you can't try things on - but it's so nice getting stuff sent to you through the post... but then you have to return it if it's wrong - but it's like getting presents... hmmm)

Haven't been running this week - but am on road to recovery (apparantly)

The gym people say I'm wonky when I run which is making one leg take all the pressure and hurting my calf. Well, I know I'm wonky cos when I run in the mud my right calf has mud kicked up it and my left one doesn't - something wrong there.
So now I"m changing tack on the weights machines and I'm being strapped into some medieval things - core strengtheners mainly which are tough - and one which specifically does your calves - very, very painful as your calf muscles are really quite small. The worst aspect though is that the main core one, a twisting one, is the machine which faces incoming people. Always hoped I would never have to get strapped into that one...

I'm almost 1/2 way through this 12-week programme - what do I do after it? The temptation is to sit back and enjoy the fruits of my labours - but those fruits will last about 4 weeks and I'll be back to square one. So I have to sign up to the place for a good while longer I reckon - and I'm getting on, I mean I don't want to be the oldest person there (which I'm not yet)

Hey ho - it feels good to be doing something positive about it rather than moaning about it!

Getting bored of this now.

Went for another run yesterday - just around the downs so nothing excessive. But I only got 1/2 way and my calf muscle went again. It's so frustrating to be limping across the grass while everyone else is running past. Today it's still painful and it's the day I have to keep going up and down stairs of course. And cycling up to the gym in an hour as well. Grr.

So what can I do? I have to wait until it's better before I can run again of course but beyond that I don't know how I can prevent it happening again. I've been investigating Chi Running - which is American I think and no one's doing it over here - but it uses gravity to propel you along rather than the power of your muscles. It guarantees pain-free running for miles and miles - what's not to like? Thing is I can't even have a go yet cos my bloody leg hurts so much.

Congratulations to Jenson Butten btw - what a star and he throughly deserves the title.

Nothing much to report really. Other than I've done no more running (in case my poor calves explode, but they're feeling better now so I have no excuse) and I have twigged what the gym is all about.

It's all very well saying 'you have to go to muscle failure' but the fact is, you only know when you get there what that feels like - and it was nothing like what I had been doing before.

Oh no.

You pass through the 'bit wobbly and it might hurt a bit tomorrow' period and do a couple more reps - and then you go for the last one which is where you cannot move the bar any further no matter how hard you try. And then you hold it there for 10 seconds.

It goes against your instincts for survival at the basest level - as in, there is no way you should put yourself in a situation where you can't escape from a sabre-toothed tiger, but there you are, doing doing just that.
The other downside is afterwards when your wobbly arms and legs are wondering what the hell's happened to them, getting onto a bike or into a car is just the strangest feeling. Add to that last night and a cretin had just about boxed me in and I was manouvring the car, parked on a steep hill I might add, with uncontrollable arms and legs...
Interesting

Am I starting to feel the benefit? Not sure. It's not dramatic, but I think I feel a little mroe confident and less flabby - or that could be me trying to justify all the effort that's going in to the gym.

OK I've been back to the gym for my 1-to-1 and it was ok. I still haven't really got the hang of the ab crunches though - I can't breathe, apparantly that's a technique thing I will need to work on.

So he's putting up the weights on most of the things - hmm, not sure how that will feel other than impossible. But the idea is that you don't work longer than 2 mins on each machine - which means you have to get to the point of muscle failure in that time, and I have been going for too long on some of them. Apparantly the look of distress on my face isn't enough to allow me to stop working and maintaining a calm face is also quite important.

I mentioned about the excrutiating pain I experienced in my mashed up calves and it would seem (as I kind of suspected cos I'm good like that) it's because as one lot of muscles is strengthened the others have to work harder/differently to compensate and it's not surprising there are pressures here and there.

He also said it meant that the effect of the exercise might take longer than for most people to happen. Hmmm. Too old, too feeble to begin with - but perhaps a more dramatic outcome? By Christmas I will be happy with the way I look? (It would have to be most extreme for that to happen)

Well, the pain of the workouts is acceptable - but that probably means I'm not working hard enough. Apparently you have to go until you really really cannot move anymore - not just a bit wobbly and can't do the slow speed, but truly cannot move a muscle.

But that pain is nothing compared with the pain I've suffered this morning.
A 6-mile trot from home, nothing dramatic, but towards the end, my calves started aching. Odd, they've never done that before. But it was bad enough for me to have a walk and then they clamped up. Couldn't believe it. Tried to run a bit further and it was like all the bounce had gone from my legs. And walking was soo painful.

I've stretched them out but it hasn't really made much difference. I will just have to rest for the rest of the day, you know, watch a film, perhaps some light blogging, that sort of thing.

It's a worry though, I mean, running is my main exercise - the walking and cycling to work is just enough to tick over, the running is the real effort. I'm not exactly going for anything right now, but this is something else I have to worry about. Perhaps I should ask Moti and see what they suggest in terms of stretching... but I did buy trainers from them so I hold them entirely responsible, nothing at all to do with my ageing physiology

Another day, another workout... And it's fine.
I don't like the intense pain of the exercises but it stops fairly quickly. I really hope it works. I mean, I know they said it wouldn't be until 8 weeks or so before I saw any difference, but already I feel energised after the workout which has to be a good thing.

And then, this morning I went for a run! I know, I know, get me etc. It was very hard work cos I guess I used up a lot of energy pumping iron ;) but I made it round the downs (4.3 miles) which I was pleased with.

And the thing about sugar - I have definitely cut down on sugar and I don't think I'm missing it. I don't get the awful feeling when my blood sugar plummets and I feel faint and dizzy, but neither am I getting that wonderful sugar rush after a bun or a chocolate... I believe what they said about it being a poison but it really helps make life, er, sweet...

So will this be a successful chapter in my long and patchy exercise history?  I do hope so - for once it's something which doesn't fill me with dread, as how bad can a 20-minute workout be? (I will find out on Monday after my first proper 1-to-1 session...)

The day of my first work out. I feel amazing. My arms are all wobbly and for once it's not cos of the flab but cos of the effort! I think there was an element of endorphins going on as well as it lasted all of 20 mins (6 exercises all done to the point of not being able to do any more, hence the wobbliness)

So how do I make this part of a new routine? 1 to 1 on Mondays, then back on Weds and Fri? or I could come on Saturday mornings and then go for a run on the downs - 2 birds, one stone, always an efficient option...

I feel so positive that this is going to do me the world of good, I hope I don't let myself down and offset the good stuff with too much wine and chocolate. But if I do go the distance and really see the benefit it means Christmas wan't have to be too restricted (or at least I will do myself less harm through over-indulgence...)

My last day of this deal with the gym is on my 45th birthday - officially heading into middle-age. Should I turn up with a big, fat, sugar-loaded cake to celebrate???

This is the day I begin at the gym and possibly the first step on the route to the next 1/2 marathon.

Bit ambitious maybe, but you have to start somewhere.

Am quite nervous about the gym thing - I know it's going to be tough and I will feel feeble and foolish for thinking I can improve. But I hope it will be inspirational as well. I'm sure the guys there are very supportive and I won't be the weakest or oldest person they've ever had to deal with.

It's for me, all this, not to make me look good compared with other people - I have to feel better about myself and that will be done by losing flabbiness and feeling stronger, perhaps running better and not having a really hurty shoulder from time to time.

So, an hour's induction and inspiration today, another trip before the next session and then start feeding in runs and yogas...

I have to do this for me!

later
It was good!! This is a gym where they don't believe in multiple reps and staggeringly heavy weights - it's about working until you can't work any more and then stopping. Sounds too good to be true.
We shall see.

Apparently I will begin to notice a difference in about 8 weeks - I have to be patient and keep going. I will then have 4 weeks left on the programme and by my birthday in December I'll really feel the benefit.
All it will take is motivation, determination, perspiration, and many other -ations and I will take over the world.
I mean, be slimmer and happier in myself...

Bristol Half Marathon 2010

I know it's a long way off yet, but here's where I start working for it!

I have joined a gym (for the unfit, aged and generally hopeless cases) in the hope I can build up some muscle and lose some weight (oh - wasn't that pretty much my plan for entering the 2009 half???)
But this deal means an hour a week with a personal trainer and unlimited use of the gym the rest of the time. I know a couple who go there and they say it's brilliant - it's not all about upping the reps and pushing til you explode, in fact it's about doing everything really slowly up to your muscles' limit. So, yes, there will be a red face involved but apparantly it gets results.
It's only for 12 weeks - til my birthday - so even if I don't feel it's me, it's not forever.

I am already carbo-loading in anticipation of my first session next Tuesday afternoon.

Hmm.

Not much happening on the running front these days. It would seem that the incentive to run was to get fit to do the 1/2 marathon and now that's gone I'm back to not running.

Perhaps the incentive to run ought to be to work off the appalling amount of excess middle-age spread weight I've piled on recently...

(Note to self - carbo loading is only acceptable for a limited time before a long run - it's not a lifestyle choice)

It's all over

I feel very sad about it actually. Annoyed with myself for not being up to the challenge and sad that I missed out on the event I've been training for.

I know there will be other runs and so on but right now I feel I've missed out.

Boyf had a good run and I felt proud of him when he crossed the line. I know I would have failed - either that or done myself some long-term damage. And a stomach upset didn't help.

All in all a bit of a disappointment really.

So this has to be the start of getting myself properly fit - to achieve all the things I set out to do when I entered the race back in whenever it was. I will keep running, do more yoga and aerobics, be an all-round wonder I guess.

Not too much to aim for is it???

I'm almost defintely not going to do it.

I went for a 5 miler this morning which was fine - heart and lungs are magnificent... But my lower legs (and bum for that matter) are a different story. I am getting pains down the sides of my calves - not achilles area - and my left heel is still aching. As I run I get pain in my upper hamstrings which stabs down my legs from time to time.

I have (almost) decided that it's daft to try and run on Sunday. My big fear is getting to the 10 mile point reasonably OK but then hitting the bit where my toe hurts, my foot siezes up again and there is still more than 3 miles to go, that's over half an hour. I don't want to walk, I most definitely don't want to be struggling along with everyone cheering me on like I'm one of the red-faced plucky but sad cases who feature in the TV round ups. (I had that fear last time)

But there is still a part of me which desperately wants to do this - well, I want to have done it. I have to ask myself if it's worth the risk of injury to do this one run. I can book any number of 10ks which I know I can do (even though I freaked out a bit on the Bristol 10k)

Now I'm sat at work with my little toe hurting, my heel aching and my lower legs periodically spasming. It's not looking good is it?

Perhaps this is where my new life of healthy and varied exercise begins. It was always going to happen after the run, perhaps I just bring it forward a couple of weeks (cos the week following a run is a rest week) and get stuck in.

But I so wanted to cross the finish line in a blaze of glory

Perhaps I will

It's Thursday - 3 days before the Big Day. Hmmm. Not feeling too hopeful.

I'm still looking for proper excuses not to do it as I know it'll be tough and ultimately pointless in the overall scheme of things. But I know on a personal level it will do me a power of good to finish (or a heap of harm if I don't...)

So I'm going to do 5 miles tomorrow morning and see how my ailments and injuries hold up to the strain. Either I will be fine in which case, bring it on, or else everything will be made much much worse and there will be no question about running on Sunday.

Am undecided which outcome is favourite....

I am looking for excuses not to do the thing now.

I know I hurt my toe on Sunday, but it's getting better. The aches are easing, although my right lower leg bit is still a bit sore.
But I am recovering.
Therefore, surely, there is no particular reason not to go for it this Sunday? I know it'll be tough, especially if it's hot. And I am in the slowest group - but I have to do it only for myself, it doesn't matter a damn that other people will be faster than me or will do it without pain - this is only for me.

So, what do I get out of doing it? Apart from pain.

Thinking back to 2006, the moment of crossing the finish line is euphoric, and there are few opportunities to feel that way so I should grab it with both hands. Or feet.

I am just dreading the final few miles where there will be loads of people looking to laugh at the wobbly people and I will be in pain - on Sunday I really thought there was no way I could have gone further - certainly not running. And I don't want to put myself through that.

I don't know yet.

I have been accused of not really training very hard, and that hurt.

Hurts.

After half an hour it's my left side - bum, ankle. After a hour my right bum joins in. After 90 mins my feel start aching, especially my right one. After that, my right foot seizes up and everything gets little more serious.

Amazingly, heart and lungs are fine - especially after running up to the camera obscura and up the cross country hill by the zoo - those bits seems to be more invigorating than knackering.

But, feet. Now there's a problem.

I had a blister on my little toe which seemed to be healing up fine, so it was duly strapped up in a plaster and seemed ok for a while. When my foot stared hurting, it felt more like a stiffness coming into it, but then the real pain began and it was all coming from this fiendish toe.

So I get in, and unpeel my socks and there it is - still, in essence, my toe, but in addition to the seriously gross dead skin from the old blister is an enormous, deep blood blister. mmm.
Feel very annoyed and puzzled as to what the hell to do about it. I'm not planning on another long run before next Sunday - might even be presuaded not to run at all frankly - so there is a good chance it'll heal by then - but how to stop it coming back??
It's not a chafing issue (I had none of those today, hurrah) it's cos my little toe is a freak of nature and curls under the other ones so it's getting squashed all the time.
It's a problem...

Distance: 11.73 with some of those up steep hills. It's still 15 mins short of the real thing though which would put my time at 2h 10 - down on last time - but I am 3 years older and about 1/2 stone heavier. Not that I should be looking for excuses. After all, surely I should be applauding the fact that I can run over 10 miles with only minor inconvenient injuries.

This time next week I may have finished the Bristol half Marathon. Not sure if I deserve to do well as I haven't trained properly for it - none of the cross training you're supposed to put in, and apart from training runs, I cycle or walk to work, but done none of the yoga and pilates I had been doing, and certainly none of the body pump or aerobics which might have made a difference.
Last time I just wanted to finish - this time I know deep down I want to do it faster - but I will have to settle for the glorious feeling of crossing the finish line without making too much of an idiot of myself by coming last or having to have a sit down along the way.
Fingers crossed.

Good luck to everyone running next Sunday - let's hope it's cool.
xx

Dear blog

I haven't run since Tuesday, partly cos my ankles have started to ache (they're getting better now)

I just don't feel up to it

My over-riding feeling about this 1/2 marathon is anger - I am so cross with myself for entering it. I'm not looking forward to it in the slightest (other than finishing, if I get that far)
It's meant I've had to run long distances which frankly isn't the best way to train - there should be some cross-training and fast runs and so on but I've done nothing like that (I do cycle or walk to work but once there I'm sitting on my fat bum all day)

What was I thinking? I was watching the London Marathon and believing it's simply a case of not stopping, of just running easily until the finish line. None of the pain of training, the days of feeling stiff and tired, or blistered and chafed. There is nothing to recommend that side of things. Nothing.
I have a plaster wrapped round my little toe where it's blistered, I have raw patches round my waist and on my legs from where my trousers have rubbed. My back aches. What's to like?

Perhaps if I'd put myself up for sponsorship I would feel more motivated, but the main motivation was to get me out doing exercise, losing weight and feeling better. I am fatter now than back in April and I feel lousy.

I know this is all my problem, there is no one else to blame.

I still have to make the decision whether to do the run or not. I'd feel guilty if I didn't cos there are lots of people who would like to have entered (they could have my racechip) but I also have to consider the possible cost of doing it - apart from all the physical pain, if I fail to finish the damn thing (or even, if I'm honest, if I walked part of the way) I will be disproportionately devastated; I will feel I've let myself down and I am useless. All very dramatic but I know there will be a high pric to pay for failure.

Now I sound like a Bond villain.

This is awful - I've finally gone over 10 miles (10.55 in fact) but it hurts so much. I have a massive blister on my little toe which is going to take some time to improve. And everything I wear seems to have some kind of chafing effect somewhere on my body - I'm running out of options.

I feel like I'm at least a week behind in training for this thing. I felt at the end of my energy today when I finished, although I guess it's different during the event and also there aren't the hills I put into training...

My neck aches where I'm tense. My feet ache cos of fallen arches. My bum hurts - really bad twinges today which feel like I want to call them sciatica.

I still have the option of not doing this, and I am sorely tempted - from the look of the course by the time we get into running the nicer bits around town it'll be after 9 miles and I will be too knackered to care.

Hmm.

Oh and also I needed more energy - I ate an awful lot yesterday for one reason or another but a small bowl of bran flakes this morning really wasn't enough. I guess I need to invest in some redbull or something for a kick.

But the worst thing is the little toe blister I think.

Getting too old and fat for this sort of nonsense.

Well, this morning was a different kettle of fish.

I did a longish run - the 9.22 miles (still haven't cracked the 10 miles...) and apart from the really sore bum, little toe blister, spasms of lower back pain, it was ok.
I swear I feel better after I've done the run up the steep hill. It's horrible at the time but once I've got my breath back, I feel stronger.
I know I have a long way to go yet but now I feel far more positive than I did after the last pathetic run.

I was trying work out where I would be on the day if I was doing the 1/2 marathon course, and I'm working on the principle that the end of the cut, after the portway, will be about 9 miles - so in theory I had reached the latter stages of the race, where it gets more interesting around town, but also where I am going to feel the pain soooo badly...

I would like to get this over and done with - not looking forward to it at all.

This is awful.
I couldn't manage a short run this morning - like, less than 5 miles. I set off intending to do a shortie but just got more and more tired and eventually just walked.
I felt terrible.

I know a lot of this is in your head, but my head was so out of it this morning it was terrible. Can I go on? I am planning to get over 10 miles on Saturday morning but at this rate I won't get to the end of the bloody road.

Can it work that you go in for the run and not know you can make it? On this morning's performance I know I can't make it. If the run was this Sunday I wouldn't even bother trying. I have 2 weeks and 3 days to decide. Unless I can do 10 miles (further would be better) I won't start the race. Plus I have to remember what I was like at the start of the 10k - I was too hot, but I also needed the loo and felt like walking all the way round. Sheesh I hate being so bloody weak.

Everything really hurts. My hamstrings feel wrong and my glutes (assuming I have some and it's not all just flab back there) feel rubbish. I don't know if it's to do with the nerve that runs down the back of your legs (sciatic???) or just lazy muscles but there is such an ache going on today.

I did the 8.2 miles round the downs route at 620 this morning which was OK - I felt strong enough and not too much out of breath, I even got a rush of endorphins after doing the hill climb which was nice - but all the time the back of my legs felt like they were weak or just slightly absent. Odd feeling and I can only hope it doesn't get any worse.

My plan this week is to do a short but faster (ha!) run on Thursday and then a 10-12 miler on Saturday morning. I am not looking forward to that - if the legs weren't aching it would be ok, a mental challenge more than physical, but right now I just want to go to bed.

I ought to have a look at the 1/2 marathon route to visualise what's happening where and when - as in, where on my training can I expect to be starting along the portway - Oh I hope they don't make us go along by the cut after the Portway - that would be mean...

9.22 miles

Only 4 miles off the full course.

Can I do it? Still not sure.

It hurts. My hamstrings aren't very good.My right foot hurts (have mashed my little toe). My shoulders ache. The list goes on.

And my ipod's not working properly - I blame the radio add-on.

But, in truth, I have run over 9 miles and it took an hour and 35 mins (still on approx 10 minute miles, which means a slower 1/2 marathon time than last time...)

And when I get back I wonder if it's worth the effort. I can't imagine setting off and doing it again and I am still overweight. And I have to fit in runs around work now which means setting off about 6am to get it done before work - and possibly cycling in to work to add on to the training effort.

But, I did do the hard uphill bit round the downs and thought my heart was going to explode - but then that feeling went away and I began to feel very good. Endorphins perhaps...

I don't know. Should I go for it and expect to do it more slowly than last time and to struggle to finish? Or give in and just drink wine and accept the ageing process...

Well, at least I went for a run.

Didn't much feel like going (no change there) but heroically forced myself into the old lycra and headed off into the morning greyness. Regretting, I might add, the wine I had last night. Never a good preparation for a run as I don't believe wine drinking can be classed as carbo-loading.

So I did a far from impressive 3 and a half mile run. Didn't enjoy any of it as I was so tired and lethargic.

This week I have to get up to 10 miles and next week it'll be 12. Chances of that happening seem to be getting ever more remote.

OK it's been a while since I last ran (5 days in fact) but I did major cycling and walking at the weekend and I think they should count.

However. I have just 'treated' myself to a run along the towpath alongside the Avon which is something I've wanted to do for a while - after all, great scenery, flattish path, what could be better???

So I looked up on the map an 8-mile route (as in found the 4-mile point where I could turn round) and went for it. And it was good - a change from the route round the houses and downs I've been doing so for that reason it was a success.

But - I was struggling. Whether it's cos I overdid the cycling and walking at the weekend, or the major part of a bottle of wine last night, but by half way back, I was having stern words with myself to keep going. I had to fight the urge to let myself go all floppy and middle-aged and to keep strong. I tried to get hooked onto a horizontal wire pulling me forward over the ground and that seemed to work for a while but it made me run too fast and I could feel the energy running out...

My left hip was aching a lot and my feet weren't too happy either.

When I got back to the car I saw I'd been out about an hour and a half which I reckoned made this a 9 mile run - hurrah. Except when I looked it up properly it was only 8.55 miles. Not much more than my last run around the downs which I felt much happier doing.

1/2 marathon? Who am I kidding?

Oh good grief

I did a 8.2 mile run around the downs and it was mainly ok. The secret is to keep in the moment - the second you think about finishing, getting home for a cup of tea etc, you're lost.

So I did the whole thing, trying not too be too bouncy, to keep shoulders and elbows down, don't lean back etc etc and I know it's the right way to do it, cos it feels more efficient, even though it's much harder work at the time. I need to build up the muscles which allow me to do that - when I was getting tired and I started running like a middle-aged woman it uses up far more energy.

And now I am in a quandry - yesterday I was all for not doing the 1/2 marathon - who am I kidding? Too old, too fat. But today I am more confident (even though I'm still 4 or 5 miles off the distance) but it means I will have to really be determined and focused and I don't know if I have it in me...

Hmmm

Jeez
Am very tired - I thought I'd added on a huge loop around the downs onto my normal 10k-ish run. But then I did the mapometer thing and found out it had added about 1/2 a mile.
Must do better.
And faster, longer etc.

Moti rang me on Friday to see if I wanted to sign up to a 1/2 marathon weekly training session. It is tempting but it's £15 a pop and it's at 11am on Sunday by which time I would prefer to be home, washed and fed.

No, I think I will have to battle on and just accept that I will have to run twice as far, in public, as I have been. But this will take place on one particular occasion and time not of my choosing.

It's a test of character and determination, of drive and chocolate.

And it's in 5 weeks.

Can I fartlek? Can I heck as like.

Really didn't want to go this morning but bravely got over myself and went for it.

And now I hurt: there is something wrong with my right leg, I'm sure. It's probably a consequence of IT band crapness but I can't seem to run with my feet going in a straight line - the right one kicks out. It's making my legs ache as I run and after as I was walking into work both legs felt really tired and achy.

Perhaps I will concentrate on stretching more - I did an extreme stretch in yoga at the weekend which really hit the spot (maybe I overdid it???)

I am doubting my capabilities of working up to the 1/2 marathon over this - I think I can do the fitness side but if it's going to hurt so much it feels like an injury - where's the point in that? Feel a bit down to be honest.

It's becoming routine - get up at 6, run 10k, ache, have breakfast, ache more at work. Collapse when home from work. Neither particularly interesting nor particularly dreadful.

It was hard work this morning for some reason. I set off with my laces tied too tight which made my feet ache so I had to stop and sort that out, but then it was ok.

However it was lovely and sunny this morning which always makes it a happier experience. And it meant the ipod didn't play silly buggers for being damp. Mind you all I listened to was Chris Moyles who is 50-50 irritating and funny. Far funnier than Today, and I can't bear listening to Wogan (sorry but I was brought up as a kid listening to Wogan and there is something unnatural about still listening when you're knocking on the door of middle age) (or indeed well along the hall of middle age and progressing towards the kitchen)

So another one done - can't quite bring myself to work out how long I have left before I have to actually do the 1/2 marathon - I have yet to steel myself for the longer training runs - possibly the first one this saturday???

It's been a while, almost a week, since I last ran. But it wasn't quite as bad as I thought it might be.

I did the usual 10k sort of thing in just under an hour so that's all OK.
My big worry was I went to yoga yesterday and I am very stiff from doing that - but once I got going it didn't seem to make any difference to running - and I felt very good from going to yoga, so I ought to continue with that.

But, hmm, ipod. I do not like the thing. OK it's very clever and all that, but useless when it comes to trying to change from radio to songs or anything which needs the touchwheel - it there is any dampness on the thing it does not work. Nothing. Bloody useless.

Can't imagine running without it though - I would continue my paranoid nightmares which keep me awake at night - I need something to take my mind off reality.

And can I double this distance to get into the 1/2 marathon in 7 weeks, 6 days???

So I did the 10k this morning.
Nothing unusual happened.
It rained a bit but that wasn't too bad - more worried about the ipod getting damp than frizzy hair...
Roll on the next time. ha ha ha :)

So achy.

I don't know where the pain is exactly, that's the problem. I think it's coming from the top bit of my hamstrings, but right now it's in the bit above the back of my knees on the outside. Possibly IT band again? I did the stretch where you cross one leg behind the other and bend forward and that hurt a lot so I guess the problem might be there. But is the solution there also??

This morning I did the 10k up to the downs and round the water tower and although I don't feel I'm progressing all that much I know I put in more effort than usual. Did it pay off? Really can't tell, other than the increasing ache which may be a good thing. The run took just under an hour (which is the same pace as my 10k run in May) so there's nothing exciting happening in that department.

I guess I am aiming for finishing the 1/2 marathon rather than coming in under 2 hours. I think deep down I can do it, but it will kill me. Perhaps I shouldn't be such a wimp??? (I am seriously beginning to believe I really do need the go-faster shorts and hat)

I am trying to convince myself that I went through the same feelings last time I went for a 1/2 marathon, namely that despite putting in more effort on runs, I don't seem to be improving. As in they're are still as tough as they ever were, and I don't feel I'm going faster or futher.

However, I know I'm going faster cos I'm pushing myself harder, so I must be improving, the trick is to improve until I can run 13 and a bit miles in under 2 hours. And there is only 8 weeks to get there...

Hmm

Even the purchase of new shorts or a hat isn't going to make that any easier...

This morning, up to the downs, the 10k route, felt good. Legs are a bit stiff and heavy (hence the feeling of no improvement) but other than that it was all fine.
I have to come to the understanding that I can improve - I do run faster for a time during these runs, and it's not impossible (even though sometimes it feels like I'm going to expire) and, if I get my head around it, I know I can run further. The question is, am I up for the challenge?
And will it continue after the event? I do hope so (as well as all the other promises of yoga and body pump - life's too short to do everything (or should it be life's too short not to do all that???))

10k
1 hour(ish)
enough calories for a super sarnie lunch!

Round the downs, plus camera obscura - a little under 5 miles but by golly there are some hills in there.
Not too painful - the shoes seem to be working as my left hip isn't giving me the grief it has been doing - hurrah. It was quite hot which made it harder work that it merited but hey ho, job done.
Then I went home and ate biscuits which totally ruined any weight-loss effect the run might have given. Stupid really cos if I could lose the weight I would be able to run better. Simple.
And I would like some new shorts to run in - ones which are slightly baggy so they don't ride up my tree trunk thighs. I have a number of crosses to bear, physically.
Apart from that, it was OK and managing to get up the hill to the camera obscura is always a thrilling achievement!

After the disaster that was the run in my new shoes on Tuesday, I wasn't holding out much hope for this morning's efforts, and promised myself a curtailed run just as far as Waitrose and back.

But it was fine. It was still really far too hot and I had to keep crossing the road to get into the shade, but I had plenty to drink, plus a dollop of sugary cordial for an energy boost and I ran all the way around the 10k route.

Hurrah for me, eh.

I know the key to a lot of this is stretching - my arse bits need loosening up - is that Glutes? Outside bit of lower hip area sort of place? Whatever they're called, they are tight, man. It comes from sitting down at a desk all day and rarely going to yoga any more.

Another key is the core strength to stop my back aching like an aching thing and pushing everything off-kilter.

So basically I have my work cut out if I'm ever going to get around the 1/2 marathon, let alone manage it faster than last time (2h 5m 55s) let alone getting under 2 hours.

But I'll give it a go!!

Next daft purchase - hat.

Bubble well and truly burst...

So I'm out there this morning, the rain's stopped, it's not too hot, new shoes raring to go... and from the off I felt pooped. Heavy, sluggish, wrong. I blame Andy Murray for making us stay up too late watching him get through to the last 8 at Wimbledon, but I wouldn't have changed that outcome even if I thought it might have made this morning's run more pleasurable... (I am quite altruistic like that)

So I struggled up to the downs and realised I was going to walk. I was tired, possibly no more tired than I've been a million times before, but there was nothing else for it, I was going to walk. Felt a bit sick actually.

It was nice to walk. It was dreadful having to start running again. And of course once you've done it once, there is nothing to stop you stopping time and time again. Which I did. Very, very hard work and a rather disppointing debut for the new shoes.

I'll try again in a couple of days. And I thought this Sunday I might go for race timing - as in breakfast at 630 and run at 930 to work out what it's going to be like on the day.

The other thing about today is because it's so hot and muggy at the moment, there is an enormous sweat issue. As in issuing copious amounts of sweat... Probably hadn't drunk enough this morning which wouldn't have helped. But another side effect of this is that I chafed - front of bra and left leg where a short rode up a bit - having flabby thighs is never a positive. So next time I will have to apply vaseline or savlon or something as it's very painful (Cannot imagine how painful runner's nipple must be...)

So that's it - bit disheartened frankly, but not totally dejected. It's too far away from the 1/2 marathon to be seriously worried about not finishing, but I would like to feel I'm generally getting better and enjoying the training more. Which I'm not at the moment.

But I will.

I've got new shoes! They make me feel like Tigger. Should have got them months ago.

But I have yet to really try them out - tomorrow morning I reckon. Got to be early cos it's sooo hot - 28 degrees today and muggy. There is a chance there'll be another enormous downpour early tomorrow - will have to risk it.

Aching legs, feet, ankles, upper left back area, bits of knees.

Apart from all that, a glorious run this morning - the full 10k in full sunshine - really really good.

It's quite a come down having to then go to work and face the day as usual. Perhaps I need to change my job and then I could come back from a run on a high and continue to feel like that for the rest of the day.

Well, I've managed to talk myself out of feeling good about going for a run, haven't I. Or perhaps inspired myself to look for another job.
Glass half full today I feel.

:)

Stats
6.26 miles, 10.07 km
584 calories (= large olive and hummus sarnie from Chandos deli)
0610 - 0710 starting with Today followed by Chris Moyles at 630

Another early morning 10k.

There was a time in my life when I would have laughed my socks off if someone had suggested that phrase would accurately describe my morning...

It wasn't so bad - lovely clear blue sky, several other joggers around, I even raced the milkman a bit.

Of course now I'm at work I feel pooped and just want to sleep - but no change there.
I know this routine does me loads of good and the endorphins are there giving me a boost. I have to stick with it.
I didn't get the aches and pains so much this time - I've either turned a corner there or else it's been so long since my last run they've healed and are about to be triggered once more. I'd prefer to think I've overcome them and am now a honed and prepared athlete.
We all have our dreams...

Haven't run since the last time. Obviously. Really ached afterwards - back problems. Is this just another sign of getting old?

I have started a body pump class which I'm hoping will beef me up a bit as I am feeble, especially in my upper body. But I wobbled so much doing the arm exercises (and the shoulder ones) that I could barely lift the barbell, let alone the weights. Today my forearms ache, my thighs and bum are beginning to hurt and as for my chest, well, it doesn't bear thinking about how bad it's going to get for the next 24 hours. Painkillers, I think. I guess you have to stick at these things: roll on next week...

But the running - I'm seriously doubting if I will get through the 1/2 marathon at this rate - I'm 3 years older, 10lbs heavier than last time I did it and then I had the motivation to do something I've never done before. Dedication, again.

Another step along the way to half marathon glory.
Or something

Another early run cos I couldn't think of a reason not to go and and least my fuschia pink top got its first outing albeit underneath a warmer cosier black one.

And omg my legs hurt. I think I have a lower back fused vertebra problem sort of thing cos a bit of my upper lower back is all over the shop and the lower lower area seems rigid. Just a thought.

But I did do 10k which isn't bad before breakfast. How I will up that to 20 I have no idea at all.

This is really not very exciting.

I have a new running vest. It's fuschia pink.
Hopefully it won't make me look any redder in the face than I do normally. It's very pretty.

It's part of the psychological build up to running - if I've spent money on something then I am obliged to make use of it.
I'm also considering getting a hat - a baseball cap sort of thing - to hide my horrible fringe: if I pin my hair back off my face I have a SJP-style horse-face and I think a cap might disguise that.
I might be wrong and the whole running in a cap thing could backfire disastrously and I end up looking like a nit.
No change there.

Proper run this morning - round the downs and around the camera obscura which makes for a very hilly run but I guess that's a good thing.

But I started off this morning with aching feet which was odd as there wasn't any reason for that. The when I set off I was aching down the back and outside of my legs. This aching was worse going downhill, quite painful in fact. But what can you do? The advice is just to keep going, keep exercising and take painkillers. So that's me for the next however long until the bloody thing stops hurting.

Grumpy

I guess I've officially begun training for the 1/2 marathon.

It was my first run since the 10K - about 2 and a half weeks afterwards and no excuse for not running before now. It was at lunchtime at work and it was horrid. It was quite warm and I'm not used to running at lunchtime as I'm usually in a bit of a slump really. And I hadn't had anything to eat since breakfast (but if I run in the morning then I haven't eaten all night...) So there are many excuses and none of them stand up really.

I am just not very fit. I cycled up Blackboy Hill to the downs and that was a killer cycle. Then setting off running just felt wrong - heavy and unpleasant. But I kept going and going and didn't let myself stop and got all the way round apart from the really nasty hilly section.

And I was so red-faced when I got back - that's the real downside to running at lunchtime - the beetroot-faced return.

And there was a massive spider in one of the showers which was off putting.

4.4 miles
6.66 km
407 calories (kitkat)

It feels like a long way off yet, but these things have a habit of coming round and biting you on the bum. I haven't run since the 10k ten days ago - still resting on laurels of getting round in under an hour I reckon.

(You can read my exploits of the 10k here: http://halfofhalfamarathon.blogspot.com/)

But I will soon be heading out - after I've got new shoes, new top, socks, bra, ipod earphones, hat, pants, jacket... Or I might just go for it. I know how good it feels when you're out there feeling no pain, just you and the endless pavement unrolling beneath your feet, the fog of exhausts fumes in your face, the screech of cars failing to stop at red lights, that sort of thing. marvellous.

Can I do it in under 2 hours? It's something to aim for but I will have to run at 10k pace all the way round and I struggled in the 10k - something to do with it being too hat and I seem to remember feeling very very nervous and tense before the start, I'm sure that had a negative effect. So perhaps I can do it - positive thinking and lots of training. Plus new shoes, top, socks....

But I am doing it this year!!!

Have been hugely inspired by watching the London Marathon and thinking it can't possibly be as hard as it looks (well OK it might be) and what with being hugely over weight and needing a goal to cheer myself up in this dismal time, I'm going for it again.

Am slightly in shock.

Am doing the 10k in a little under 2 weeks.

Will start blogging the 1/2 marathon after that event...

:)