Another day, another workout... And it's fine.
I don't like the intense pain of the exercises but it stops fairly quickly. I really hope it works. I mean, I know they said it wouldn't be until 8 weeks or so before I saw any difference, but already I feel energised after the workout which has to be a good thing.

And then, this morning I went for a run! I know, I know, get me etc. It was very hard work cos I guess I used up a lot of energy pumping iron ;) but I made it round the downs (4.3 miles) which I was pleased with.

And the thing about sugar - I have definitely cut down on sugar and I don't think I'm missing it. I don't get the awful feeling when my blood sugar plummets and I feel faint and dizzy, but neither am I getting that wonderful sugar rush after a bun or a chocolate... I believe what they said about it being a poison but it really helps make life, er, sweet...

So will this be a successful chapter in my long and patchy exercise history?  I do hope so - for once it's something which doesn't fill me with dread, as how bad can a 20-minute workout be? (I will find out on Monday after my first proper 1-to-1 session...)

The day of my first work out. I feel amazing. My arms are all wobbly and for once it's not cos of the flab but cos of the effort! I think there was an element of endorphins going on as well as it lasted all of 20 mins (6 exercises all done to the point of not being able to do any more, hence the wobbliness)

So how do I make this part of a new routine? 1 to 1 on Mondays, then back on Weds and Fri? or I could come on Saturday mornings and then go for a run on the downs - 2 birds, one stone, always an efficient option...

I feel so positive that this is going to do me the world of good, I hope I don't let myself down and offset the good stuff with too much wine and chocolate. But if I do go the distance and really see the benefit it means Christmas wan't have to be too restricted (or at least I will do myself less harm through over-indulgence...)

My last day of this deal with the gym is on my 45th birthday - officially heading into middle-age. Should I turn up with a big, fat, sugar-loaded cake to celebrate???

This is the day I begin at the gym and possibly the first step on the route to the next 1/2 marathon.

Bit ambitious maybe, but you have to start somewhere.

Am quite nervous about the gym thing - I know it's going to be tough and I will feel feeble and foolish for thinking I can improve. But I hope it will be inspirational as well. I'm sure the guys there are very supportive and I won't be the weakest or oldest person they've ever had to deal with.

It's for me, all this, not to make me look good compared with other people - I have to feel better about myself and that will be done by losing flabbiness and feeling stronger, perhaps running better and not having a really hurty shoulder from time to time.

So, an hour's induction and inspiration today, another trip before the next session and then start feeding in runs and yogas...

I have to do this for me!

later
It was good!! This is a gym where they don't believe in multiple reps and staggeringly heavy weights - it's about working until you can't work any more and then stopping. Sounds too good to be true.
We shall see.

Apparently I will begin to notice a difference in about 8 weeks - I have to be patient and keep going. I will then have 4 weeks left on the programme and by my birthday in December I'll really feel the benefit.
All it will take is motivation, determination, perspiration, and many other -ations and I will take over the world.
I mean, be slimmer and happier in myself...

Bristol Half Marathon 2010

I know it's a long way off yet, but here's where I start working for it!

I have joined a gym (for the unfit, aged and generally hopeless cases) in the hope I can build up some muscle and lose some weight (oh - wasn't that pretty much my plan for entering the 2009 half???)
But this deal means an hour a week with a personal trainer and unlimited use of the gym the rest of the time. I know a couple who go there and they say it's brilliant - it's not all about upping the reps and pushing til you explode, in fact it's about doing everything really slowly up to your muscles' limit. So, yes, there will be a red face involved but apparantly it gets results.
It's only for 12 weeks - til my birthday - so even if I don't feel it's me, it's not forever.

I am already carbo-loading in anticipation of my first session next Tuesday afternoon.

Hmm.

Not much happening on the running front these days. It would seem that the incentive to run was to get fit to do the 1/2 marathon and now that's gone I'm back to not running.

Perhaps the incentive to run ought to be to work off the appalling amount of excess middle-age spread weight I've piled on recently...

(Note to self - carbo loading is only acceptable for a limited time before a long run - it's not a lifestyle choice)

It's all over

I feel very sad about it actually. Annoyed with myself for not being up to the challenge and sad that I missed out on the event I've been training for.

I know there will be other runs and so on but right now I feel I've missed out.

Boyf had a good run and I felt proud of him when he crossed the line. I know I would have failed - either that or done myself some long-term damage. And a stomach upset didn't help.

All in all a bit of a disappointment really.

So this has to be the start of getting myself properly fit - to achieve all the things I set out to do when I entered the race back in whenever it was. I will keep running, do more yoga and aerobics, be an all-round wonder I guess.

Not too much to aim for is it???

I'm almost defintely not going to do it.

I went for a 5 miler this morning which was fine - heart and lungs are magnificent... But my lower legs (and bum for that matter) are a different story. I am getting pains down the sides of my calves - not achilles area - and my left heel is still aching. As I run I get pain in my upper hamstrings which stabs down my legs from time to time.

I have (almost) decided that it's daft to try and run on Sunday. My big fear is getting to the 10 mile point reasonably OK but then hitting the bit where my toe hurts, my foot siezes up again and there is still more than 3 miles to go, that's over half an hour. I don't want to walk, I most definitely don't want to be struggling along with everyone cheering me on like I'm one of the red-faced plucky but sad cases who feature in the TV round ups. (I had that fear last time)

But there is still a part of me which desperately wants to do this - well, I want to have done it. I have to ask myself if it's worth the risk of injury to do this one run. I can book any number of 10ks which I know I can do (even though I freaked out a bit on the Bristol 10k)

Now I'm sat at work with my little toe hurting, my heel aching and my lower legs periodically spasming. It's not looking good is it?

Perhaps this is where my new life of healthy and varied exercise begins. It was always going to happen after the run, perhaps I just bring it forward a couple of weeks (cos the week following a run is a rest week) and get stuck in.

But I so wanted to cross the finish line in a blaze of glory

Perhaps I will

It's Thursday - 3 days before the Big Day. Hmmm. Not feeling too hopeful.

I'm still looking for proper excuses not to do it as I know it'll be tough and ultimately pointless in the overall scheme of things. But I know on a personal level it will do me a power of good to finish (or a heap of harm if I don't...)

So I'm going to do 5 miles tomorrow morning and see how my ailments and injuries hold up to the strain. Either I will be fine in which case, bring it on, or else everything will be made much much worse and there will be no question about running on Sunday.

Am undecided which outcome is favourite....

I am looking for excuses not to do the thing now.

I know I hurt my toe on Sunday, but it's getting better. The aches are easing, although my right lower leg bit is still a bit sore.
But I am recovering.
Therefore, surely, there is no particular reason not to go for it this Sunday? I know it'll be tough, especially if it's hot. And I am in the slowest group - but I have to do it only for myself, it doesn't matter a damn that other people will be faster than me or will do it without pain - this is only for me.

So, what do I get out of doing it? Apart from pain.

Thinking back to 2006, the moment of crossing the finish line is euphoric, and there are few opportunities to feel that way so I should grab it with both hands. Or feet.

I am just dreading the final few miles where there will be loads of people looking to laugh at the wobbly people and I will be in pain - on Sunday I really thought there was no way I could have gone further - certainly not running. And I don't want to put myself through that.

I don't know yet.

I have been accused of not really training very hard, and that hurt.