never has a blog been more aptly titled...

I am going to suffer when I get back running: I will want to just get out there straight back into the 5-miler runs.
But it won't be like that.
For a start I will be very unfit as I've done nothing to keep up my fitness. I had considered rowing machines, cross-trainers that sort of thing, but just haven't got any further than thinking about it.
And I know I will be very hesitant and won't want to risk this all happening again - perhaps that's wise. Perhaps I need to be cautious and take it very easy in getting back into it.
Perhaps I need to join a club for *shudders* beginners...
Perhsp perhaps perhaps.

Truth is I'm heading into the unknown: I have never been injured like this before. Twisted ankles seem logical and it's easy to know in your mind when it's ok to run again.
This is something else: because it wasn't an injury like going over on your ankle or falling and hurting your knee, there is the worry that I'm just going to end up in exactly the same place as I have been for the past month.
And it's one place I never want to come back to.

Getting better

I truly feel my foot is getting better.
But it's not there yet.
And I'm dreading how it's going to be when I start running again - will I be able to build up slowly (like about 5 mins at a time)? Will I be so fearful of it happening again I kind of make it happen again? Or perhaps it will be fine and I will just get on and become one of these heroically aged runners you see doing middling well in the road races...

recovery

If it is a stress fracture, it'll be 4 - 6 weeks before I can even think about running.

The latest thought was it might be something to do with ligaments or tendons. It's definitely not the joint, it's defintitely my middle toe. I guess it's nice to narrow it down

But I'm still hacked off about it. Yesterday I walked less than 1/4 mile and I was in pain every step of the way, and quite knackered with having to compensate for limping so much. It's made me feel pathetic and useless and I don't like that one bit.

But there is a definite improvement. One good thing to come of the terrible weather is that I can wear my winter boots which are supportive and probably help my foot quite a lot.

So I'm happy that it's improving, quite frustrated that it's taking (in my mind) so long and very concerned about when I do start running again, what's going to stop it happening again? I think I'm clued up as to how to avoid it, but it went so suddenly last time I don't believe I will never be 100% confident...

First physio session

I think it's getting better. It's a lot less hurty apart from first thing in the morning when I believe it's utterly shot and I will never walk again. But then I get over it and generally it only hurts if I walk too far on it or plain old forget and try to bound upstairs or something foolish.
The anticipation of pain is stopping me from using it normally, which makes everythng else tight and achy. Not helping.
I've had my physio session and have been straightened out quite a bit, so hopefully my feet will hit the ground flat in future rather than all curled up to one side (squashing the bones, causing the problem: see, it all adds up)  and I have a strapping on my foot to help my big toe joint hit the floor alongside the other toes, not 1/2 an hour later as it has been.
So, all in all, I'm feeling quite positive: when I will be running again I really don't know. I guess once I can walk without pain, I can build up to running on the spot etc. Oh, can't wait...

Alternative diagnosis

It could be 'metatarsalgia' Pain in the metatarsals. Descriptive enough to be plausible.
It explains why my foot doesn't ache a lot of the time, but not why it should come on so suddenly.
Then I think to myself that there have been times, mornings especially, when my foot's been really painful. So perhaps it's the 'algia...
Whatevers - it's getting a bit better now although walking is a pain, and I'd hoped to walk a bit this weekend. Might just have to put feet up and laze around instead.
I've booked in with the Physiotherapist at Moti cos he promised me he could mend me and get me back 'barefoot' running. So he is my new best friend.